breaking up is hard to do
this song kind of got stuck to my head since i heard this guy, who thought he looked like ellen degeneres, sing it in AI. didn't know then it would be my theme song a few days later.
i finally did it, finally got it over with, finally got it off my chest. it was hard, and i was so sick to my stomach as the "zero hour" drew near, and then it's over. and right now, i honestly dunno if it's worth it.
anne said that nothing's too perfect for one's appetite. and she's right. that's why sometimes we have to leave, even if that means getting out of our comfort zone. but i just need to make sure that i'm not heading for the worse. now am i swinging life away or what?
i thought it would be liberating, to finally talk to our boss about my intent to leave the company. i showed him my resignation letter, but he asked me to hand it in next week instead. so it's not completely official yet, i suppose. told him i'm sorry to leave and i wouldn't if i don't have to (as if i'm indispensable!) but he told me that if i have to do it to achieve my goal, then i have his support. and that's after telling me to just say if there's anything that can be done to keep me from leaving. if kindness could kill, i'd be dead. how heartbreaking is that?
well, now it's finally sinking in, that i'll soon be leaving my dear friends at work, and my kind boss. breaking up is indeed, hard to do. but it's a done deal. and i'm off some place where things are uncertain, and definitely challenging. and i guess i need to be gone for a while, because lately it seems like i've been hearing a lot of goodbyes (our dog basha died, she's been with us since i was 9 or 10 i think; close friends leaving for work and graduate school; acquaintances leaving before you even get to know more of them...) and sometimes i wish i'm not the one who gets left behind. but now that i think about it, it's probably just as hard for the person leaving too (ok, maybe not for your acquaintances).
i went shopping with angeli today, and it was fun spending time with her, despite our aching legs, being short on cash, and not being able to rely on ATMs when we needed them most - i can't believe i had to trade in $6 at the money changer just to ensure that i could get home! =s and when i did get home, while rummaging through the stuff i just bought, i realized that practically all the things i got, angeli has too (just different in color or print). i'd definitely miss how we'd text each other what blouse we'd wear so we won't be caught dead wearing the same thing on the same day. but more than that, i know i'll miss her company sorely. just as much as i'd miss sheila, lorraine, joy, jade, jp, and all the people i've come to be friends with. *sigh* :(
it's kind of scary not knowing if things are actually better in the place you're heading to. quoting our country manager: "manila: a world city. philippines: 7,107 tropical islands …why live anywhere else?" - now while i could think of a million answers to that, i still think there's no place like home, and home's here, so it's here where i should stay. anyway, i actually won't be gone long - i might, depending on how things work out. but for all we know, i'd probably be back home before you could say jack robinson (or "butterscotch... but say it real slow" :P).
the clock is ticking... one month to go. got to make the most of it.
i finally did it, finally got it over with, finally got it off my chest. it was hard, and i was so sick to my stomach as the "zero hour" drew near, and then it's over. and right now, i honestly dunno if it's worth it.
anne said that nothing's too perfect for one's appetite. and she's right. that's why sometimes we have to leave, even if that means getting out of our comfort zone. but i just need to make sure that i'm not heading for the worse. now am i swinging life away or what?
i thought it would be liberating, to finally talk to our boss about my intent to leave the company. i showed him my resignation letter, but he asked me to hand it in next week instead. so it's not completely official yet, i suppose. told him i'm sorry to leave and i wouldn't if i don't have to (as if i'm indispensable!) but he told me that if i have to do it to achieve my goal, then i have his support. and that's after telling me to just say if there's anything that can be done to keep me from leaving. if kindness could kill, i'd be dead. how heartbreaking is that?
well, now it's finally sinking in, that i'll soon be leaving my dear friends at work, and my kind boss. breaking up is indeed, hard to do. but it's a done deal. and i'm off some place where things are uncertain, and definitely challenging. and i guess i need to be gone for a while, because lately it seems like i've been hearing a lot of goodbyes (our dog basha died, she's been with us since i was 9 or 10 i think; close friends leaving for work and graduate school; acquaintances leaving before you even get to know more of them...) and sometimes i wish i'm not the one who gets left behind. but now that i think about it, it's probably just as hard for the person leaving too (ok, maybe not for your acquaintances).
i went shopping with angeli today, and it was fun spending time with her, despite our aching legs, being short on cash, and not being able to rely on ATMs when we needed them most - i can't believe i had to trade in $6 at the money changer just to ensure that i could get home! =s and when i did get home, while rummaging through the stuff i just bought, i realized that practically all the things i got, angeli has too (just different in color or print). i'd definitely miss how we'd text each other what blouse we'd wear so we won't be caught dead wearing the same thing on the same day. but more than that, i know i'll miss her company sorely. just as much as i'd miss sheila, lorraine, joy, jade, jp, and all the people i've come to be friends with. *sigh* :(
it's kind of scary not knowing if things are actually better in the place you're heading to. quoting our country manager: "manila: a world city. philippines: 7,107 tropical islands …why live anywhere else?" - now while i could think of a million answers to that, i still think there's no place like home, and home's here, so it's here where i should stay. anyway, i actually won't be gone long - i might, depending on how things work out. but for all we know, i'd probably be back home before you could say jack robinson (or "butterscotch... but say it real slow" :P).
the clock is ticking... one month to go. got to make the most of it.
posted by christinesixteen at 6:18 AM
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